Back to the World

A boomerang always comes back to its point of origin.

Much like a boomerang, I feel like I’ve been on a journey. So much has changed. I’ve learned a great deal about myself, others, and the world around me. I’ve moved, started a new job, and made acquaintance with THE CUTEST NIECE IN THE WORLD (and yes, she will get a hashtag in all caps). Even in the middle of all of the changes, there were parts I missed.

As time went on, I wondered how I would do it. When I would do it. If I still could do it. I love words, love putting words together, yet something I’ve taken so much joy in felt… foreign. Time went on. I kept putting it off. Compensating by adding to an ever-growing imaginary “to-do” list that had no progress as well. Trying out other new things, and wondering how to share. Twitter, of course, kept me occupied, but finding time (outside of livetweeting network tv) just was not working. Ask my ukulele how that’s working out.

I looked up and realized it was November. Halfway through the month, almost. The homeskillet Alise reminded me it was Tevin Campbell’s (one of the faves and you will never debate me on this, idk idk idk) 38th birthday1, and days ago, Sesame Street (another childhood favorite of mine) turned 45. In less than two weeks, I’ll be 29. Don’t look at my face; just trust me on this one. I ordered my birth certificate as the ultimate receipt.

Because I’ve been saying I’m “almost 30” since I was 25, I am really into this whole concept of carpe-ing the diem. Is it scary? Sometimes. Is it worth it? Sometimes. Is there a lesson behind it? Most definitely. Will you (meaning I) share it? Well… if I write, I will. At this current moment, I see myself at the edge of a swimming pool, ready for my first lessons2. I stare out at the pool ahead of me, and shudder as my toes hang over the line. Nothing separates me from exploring the vastness around me, except for my fluctuating willingness to get in.

After a few deep breaths, a hit of my asthma pump, and another check to make sure my cap is on, I’m jumping back in.

Need to know where to find me? Check out Twitter and Instagram, @beezhunny is my handle at both. As always, I’m working on being a work in progress, and would love some extra friends on the journey. Until next time, tell me what your favorite Tevin Campbell song is in the comments. Make a playlist (or listen to mine). Jam. It’s a celebration! Like a boomerang, I’m back!

The Box Braided Balladeer would approve.

The Box Braided Balladeer would approve.

Glad I Made it Through without a “Do the Write Thing” Pun,

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1- I set a calendar reminder in Outlook so I never forget Tevin Campbell’s birthday again.
2-Getting swimming lessons is on my “30 list.” More on that later. Kthxbai.

What DO the Lonely do at Christmas?

First of all, they don’t listen to that song. Just don’t do it- you’ll find yourself torn between wanting to two step with the nearest broom and jumping off the last step before the end of the staircase. Because I am likely spending the holiday solo, I can give you a rundown of what I (and other twenty-to-thirty-somethings [and beyond] in my same predicament may be up to this season):

  1. Online shopping for family and friends out of guilt since you won’t be seeing them.
  2. Alternating between “should I get this for them… or myself?” because you wonder if solo holidays count as “Treat Yo’ Self” days. Note: they can, but guilt-shop responsibly.   
  3. Wonder where your voice went, because you haven’t really talked to anyone in the last x days.
  4. Perusing your social networks and not making faces at people uploading gifts from significant others/spouses/grandparents/pets/Santa/etc.
  5. Being genuinely surprised for people that have great news to share, included the expected engagements that always happen. No snark allowed.
  6. Turn off your computer.
  7. Turn your computer back on because the Wii isn’t plugged up, and how else are you going to stream My Little Pony?
  8. Work out like no one’s watching (because they aren’t).
  9. Catch up on all of that cleaning you’ve been meaning to do. Remember you downloaded the “Unf**k Your Habitat” app,” then start playing a game. It is an off day, you know. The floordrobe will be handled soon enough.
  10. Resist the urge to bake cupcakes until you remember you don’t have a cupcake tin. Or ingredients. Or a vehicle to buy last minute supplies for such urges. Look for muffin tins on Amazon.
  11. Regret cancelling that car rental at the last minute. You did want to buy Christmas gifts, though.
  12. Spend lots of time in deep reflection, both self-focused and outside-focused. Pray. Think about how next year will be different. Plan for next year to be different.
  13. Plan to be away next year- a cruise, perhaps? Wait, silly. Go see your family, THEN cruise.
  14. Listen to that Christmas playlist you made on Spotify just a week ago. While everyone was all ‘fa-la-la’, you were all ‘it’s not time!’ Now that it is time, you can indulge a bit. Jiggalate and all of that. Make fun of Paul McCartney’s “Simply Having a Wonderful Christmastime” and Wham’s “Last Christmas” just like you would any other year.
  15. Hear noise outside the door, and wonder if a surprise package came for you. Nope- it’s for the neighbor.
  16. Be thankful for people that do invite you to spend time with their family during the holidays, knowing you have none nearby. Sometimes, it’s a welcome experience- you get to learn how another family does their traditions, and you get a good meal out of it, too. Sometimes, though, you feel very voyeuristic, and it’s hard reconciling the words “guest” with “outsider.” It’s not the family’s fault, though. You know that very well, and will enjoy the time in others’ company anyway.
  17. Call your siblings and do your annual MST3K-esque viewing of “A Christmas Story.” Reminisce on some of those experiences you can only share with people you’ve shared a home and similar DNA with for decades.
  18. Decide on dinner. You could order duck from the Chinese joint like two years ago (the “A Christmas Story” viewing prompted this), but you may just bake some ribs because it’s Christmas, you’re cooking for yourself, and eff tradition. You’re making your own!
  19. Call/skype/G+hangout some friends who may be in the same situation as you, but thousands of miles away. Smile, laugh, and make plans to see each other.
  20. Realize that no matter how much you LOVE the Grumpy Cat meme, it’s not indicative of your general attitude towards the holiday and the love, hope, and optimism contained therein.
  21. Know that although this may be a lonely Christmas, it could be much worse. It could be a homeless Christmas, or a family-less Christmas, or an “I just lost a loved one” Christmas. Feel your heart churn for the emotions that people you’ve never seen or met may be going through.
  22. Dance like nobody’s watching (because they aren’t).

So, I know I’m not the only one with the possibility of a solo holiday, or ever has spent one sans people. What did you do? How did you make it? Did you dance half as much as I am?

Either way, Merry Christmas. Oh, tidings of comfort and joy.

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