“The key to success is often the ability to adapt”

… I’m currently working on my adaptability. This past week has made it rather hard for me to do so, though. Just when I think there’d be a lull in activity, something comes at me and hits me all over again. yippee!

I sleep on a futon at a friend’s, and perhaps tarnished the trust an individual has had in me over something I perceive to be minor, but hey, you never know the other side of the story with these kind of things. Currently working on righting the wrong.

My back kind of hurts.

Also found out friend that I’m currently living with has decided to move with her husband 5 months before she originally planned to (he’s with the USAF), so that gives me about a month or so to find a (permanent) job and a place to live… oy me.

I’ve started the application blitz again. I think the most logical way about this is to get the job first, then the place…

and I’ll eventually need a car.

… and a hug.

I absolutely HATE this temporary position that I’m in also. There’s no room for me to grow personally or professionally, I’m only given menial tasks (that anyone can do), but am somehow always watched like a hawk (like being timed on my capability to perform such tasks. Most of the time I finish them faster than expected, only to be met with scrutinizing glances, as if I can’t work a copier, or prepare a simple document in Excel that’s just data entry). I’m expected to answer the phones and know all of the information about the department, yet I have not met ANY of the people I end up transferring calls to. If this were a larger department, I’d understand, but this is nothing. Luckily the faculty I’ve encountered are nice, aside from the fact that most of them can’t use a copier … o_O). I gave them a huge side eye when given an “inventory sheet” to check against that was so outdated, I ended up creating my own from scratch. The closet was dusty and I had a mini-asthma attack. I kept trucking, though I lost my voice for a couple of hours. Nobody knew anything different. I’ve fought with the idea of asking for another placement, but at the same time, I really need the money. I just don’t know how much I can take. I don’t like the idea of people giving me work just to “keep me busy,” especially when I know my skills and helpfulness can be used to other degrees. Soon, it will be over. Soon.

I’m still hopeful that things will work out in my favor. Lots of prayer and self-reflection lead me to this conclusion. Times this week I’ve just wanted to cry: partially because of how this isn’t my ideal situation, and partially from gratefulness that it isn’t as bad as it could be. I sometimes struggle with the concept of being grateful and ingrateful at the same time: how does that happen? Why do we let it happen?

For now, I’ll just work on making today the best that I can make it. Forget about yesterday, and let tomorrow work itself out if/when I’m blessed to see it come. For me, that’s harder than it appears, so that’s where the “one day at a time” comes in…

Happy Monday!

–Beez

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